Through this book people began to understand that as human beings, our level of achievement in anything be it tennis, business, wealth, or happiness, is in direct proportion to what we really think of ourselves deep down. And so personal coaching for the mind was born and is now used throughout the world to bring out the best in individuals and corporations, and unleash the human potential for excellence.

The thing to note about Life Coaching is that it is coaching to enhance your personal qualities, not directing or teaching of someone else’s ideas. A good sports coach doesn’t say to his pupil ‘No that’s not how you do it, here let me show you!’, and goes on to try and mould the student to be like him. Instead he identifies and maximizes the pupil’s unique strengths, and helps them transform any weaknesses into positives. He ‘coaches’ them on improving their own style of playing the game so that they are functioning at their ultimate best.

Similarly Life Coaching is not about telling you how you should be living your life. No coach will claim to be a life expert and if they do they are coaches to be avoided. Sure, Life Coaches are highly trained in human behaviour and will usually achieve great results in their own style of living, but the only expert in your life is you. As does the sports coach, the life coach will help you tap into your strengths while turning the tables on any weaknesses so that every aspect of your unique game of life is being controlled by you.

Coaching is increasingly used in companies to maximize and develop their best people. It’s not the systems that make a company powerful and continually reaching its targets, it’s the people that make up the company, the puzzle pieces that make up the whole. Systems are great to keep the company operating smoothly however without people working at their most efficient that’s all the company will do- operate smoothly. Coaching, all the way from the executives to the most junior employee, will bring out the best in people and create powerful results.

You may have noticed that all top athletes have a coach. They are at the top because their coach pushes the forward and supports them in staying there. All entrepreneurs have a coach, keeping them on a clear path to increased success in their chosen ventures. Most coaches have a coach! Because to bring out the best in others we must be constantly striving to better ourselves.

Coaching using NLP (the study of human excellence and how to replicate it in others) is the way of the future. It is the fastest way to achieve anything from overcoming a current challenge in your life, to realizing your biggest goals and dreams.

Find the coach that best suits your goals, who gives you the level of support you need, and who is genuinely committed to their craft; and you will find passion and purpose within you that you never knew existed. This new power that is unleashed from within you, your true human potential, allows you to function at a higher level mentally, physically, spiritually, financially, in every area of your life. And the changes are, without a doubt, deep and lasting.

Here are a couple of motivational quotes to get you started on your journey:

‘It has been my observation that most people get ahead during the time that others waste time.’ – Henry Ford

‘Success is not for the timid. It is for those who seek guidance, make decisions, and take decisive action.’ – Jose Silva

‘If you don’t act now while it’s fresh in your mind, it will probably join the list of things you were always going to do but never quite got around to.’ – Paul Clithero

Thirty years ago, when I played football, hockey, golf, and lacrosse year round, our dad was an enthusiastic sports parent. He often impeached us to play harder and live up to our abilities. He was quick to express his frustration with referees and coaches.

Our dad was so into our games, he couldn’t restrain himself. That was both good and bad for the five of us. We liked all the attention, but often felt pressured to perform better – and better!

Now that I am a sports parent myself to two children, I understand just how difficult it is for parents—like my dad—to figure out how best to support and help their kids in sports. And as a leading sports psychology expert, I’ve been studying this issue for many years.

Sports parents today have many tough questions to ponder: Should you push kids to try harder in sports when you know they have the athletic ability? What do you say or do after your child or teen’s crushing defeat?

What to do if your daughter worries constantly about what others think of her sports performance? How do you behave on the sidelines when you’re frustrated with coaches or referees? These are hard questions, and the answers aren’t always obvious.

As a sports parent or youth sports coach, you have an important impact on your kids in sports. Your support and communication can help kids improve their confidence and success in sports.

You need to be there to help kids weather the ups and downs of athletics. Young athletes who are pushed too hard and experience negative coaching are more likely to drop out of sports altogether. It’s your job to evaluate and communicate with their coaches in ways that ensure your athletes’ confidence is boosted—not crushed. What’s more, it’s your job be as positive as possible and to focus on fun. When kids are having fun, they also feel confident.

I’ve come in contact with every kind of coach imaginable. For example, I’ve wondered how to deal with the coach who favors his own child.

I’ve also struggled with coaches who, on the other end of the spectrum, can’t live without my young athlete—and insist on having my child play even when he’s sick or injured! These coaches have favored my young athlete in ways that upset other sports parents and players.

In addition, I’ve had to cope with coaches who are sometimes grouchy, have bad days, or dish out negative feedback in ways that hurt young athletes’ feelings. I even had to decide what to do about a coach who was abusive.

Understanding how to deal with these coaches is not easy as a sports parent.

I worry that if I choose to speak up, I may interfere in a way that creates friction between my kids and their coaches. On the other hand, if I don’t intervene, my kids could get hurt or lose confidence.

Knowing when and when not to intervene is a really tough decision for a sports parent. I don’t want the coach to walk away with the idea that I think my child deserves special treatment. But at the same time, I want to protect my child as much as possible.

When should you intervene and have a talk with the coach? Here are some scenarios:

• When your child and the team are not having any fun

• When your child complains about how negative or mean the coach is

• When your child is forced to practice and play when injured

• When the coach threatens to bench your child for making mistakes, which may undermine your child’s confidence and increase his or her fear of failing.

If you decide to talk to your child’s coach about one of the above issues, make sure you pick the right moment. Don’t do it at half-time of the regional play-offs or in the middle of practice!

None of the other parents of the team were willing to call up the coach and question his style. Why? They were afraid the coach would bench their sons or cut their playing time.

As a sports parent–especially if you’re a parent to an elementary or middle-school aged child–it’s your job to ensure your children are in good hands. Before you even sign your kids up for a team, it’s entirely appropriate and reasonable to interview the coach. You should ask potential coaches about their philosophy and how they handle playing time.

That’s not all you can do. If your young athletes are already part of a team, but don’t seem happy with the coach, you need to do some research. Is the coach always unhappy with your athlete’s performance, no matter how well she performs? Does the coach criticize your child constantly, or dwell on mistakes? Is your child withdrawn or quiet around the coach? If so, you need to take action.

You can begin by discussing your worries with the coach. Don’t yell at the coach, call him names or blame him. Simply state your concerns and see how he responds.

When my son’s coach said, “I’m trying to ensure the boys are tough enough to play in high school and you need to stop babying them,” I wasn’t happy. It was time to find another coach.

If you can’t find another coach, it’s appropriate for you to consider coaching your own team.